The Snippage
It's taken me a while to get around to it, but I have been in pain, so sharing that pain seemed even more painful while I was in it. Now that I am recovered I can share.
3 weeks ago I went in for voluntary sterilization (aka: vasectomy). The process itself was rather painless, but the recovery period was pretty rough. Per my doctor's instructions, I took my prescribed valium 1 hour prior to surgery. Violet drove me in to the hospital and by the time we got there I was feeling relaxed in a huge way. After shuffling in to the office and getting called in, I sat on the exam bed and dumbly stared at the wall trying to figure out how I could get more valium. The nurse took my blood pressure (which was very low -- feeling good), and then she left telling me the doctor would be in to see me in a few minutes. I promptly fell asleep.
I woke up and the doctor began work almost immediately. He began asking me about my job and had me talking about web coding, eBay addictions, fishing, and beerfest. Before I knew it he said he was finished. The whole thing took about 20 minutes with no pain involved. He asked if I had brought a jock strap, which I told him I had. He suggested that I continue wearing a jock for at least the next few days while the worst of the swelling went away, and to put ice on my stuff to decrease swelling. He also gave me a little plastic cup and ordered me to bring it back in to the clinic with a sample inside within 6-to-8 weeks. They'll check it for any swimmers and I'll be considered safe and sterile after 2 "all clear" samples. If recanalization has occurred, I'll have to go back in for another try. That would be bad. Finally, the doctor told me I should stay off my feet and not to try even sitting upright for the next few days.
So, I thanked the doctor and headed out to the lobby. Violet was there to take me home and I promptly got in to bed to rest. I felt some minor pain -- more of an ache -- in my stomach and groin. That ache increased over the next couple days, but I did my best to stay off my feet and to keep my groin extra-safe from anything and everything directly hitting it. I kept switching out bags of frozen peas to keep down the swelling. Most of the time I spent watching movies or catching up on my GTA - San Andreas playing. Violet did a great job of keeping the kids off of me for most of my recovery period and she took care of any food/beverage needs too.
The surgery was on a Thursday, so by Sunday I was up and moving around. There was still some very sore spots, but the swelling had gone down and the ice was no longer needed. I returned to work on Monday morning, but ended up taking Tuesday off after I had pushed it a little too hard too soon. I think the thing that caught me off guard the most was the after-effects which weren't discussed by the doctor and I had no idea what the hell was going on. Namely, I couldn't tell when I had to piss. You know that feeling you get when your bladder is telling you it needs some pressure relief? Well, I couldn't get that feeling at all. I wasn't incontinent or anything, but I would have to just guess if I might have to piss every so often. It was a weird experience. After asking some other guys who have gotten the Big V, the consensus was that it has to do with the local anesthetic you get down in the scrotum just before the cut is made. Tasty. Anyway, that was fairly annoying for about a week.
Full recovery was marked about 2 full weeks after the surgery. Bladder fill sensors were functioning, I didn't have to walk around like a cowboy any more, and things were generally happy down below once again.
3 weeks ago I went in for voluntary sterilization (aka: vasectomy). The process itself was rather painless, but the recovery period was pretty rough. Per my doctor's instructions, I took my prescribed valium 1 hour prior to surgery. Violet drove me in to the hospital and by the time we got there I was feeling relaxed in a huge way. After shuffling in to the office and getting called in, I sat on the exam bed and dumbly stared at the wall trying to figure out how I could get more valium. The nurse took my blood pressure (which was very low -- feeling good), and then she left telling me the doctor would be in to see me in a few minutes. I promptly fell asleep.
I woke up and the doctor began work almost immediately. He began asking me about my job and had me talking about web coding, eBay addictions, fishing, and beerfest. Before I knew it he said he was finished. The whole thing took about 20 minutes with no pain involved. He asked if I had brought a jock strap, which I told him I had. He suggested that I continue wearing a jock for at least the next few days while the worst of the swelling went away, and to put ice on my stuff to decrease swelling. He also gave me a little plastic cup and ordered me to bring it back in to the clinic with a sample inside within 6-to-8 weeks. They'll check it for any swimmers and I'll be considered safe and sterile after 2 "all clear" samples. If recanalization has occurred, I'll have to go back in for another try. That would be bad. Finally, the doctor told me I should stay off my feet and not to try even sitting upright for the next few days.
So, I thanked the doctor and headed out to the lobby. Violet was there to take me home and I promptly got in to bed to rest. I felt some minor pain -- more of an ache -- in my stomach and groin. That ache increased over the next couple days, but I did my best to stay off my feet and to keep my groin extra-safe from anything and everything directly hitting it. I kept switching out bags of frozen peas to keep down the swelling. Most of the time I spent watching movies or catching up on my GTA - San Andreas playing. Violet did a great job of keeping the kids off of me for most of my recovery period and she took care of any food/beverage needs too.
The surgery was on a Thursday, so by Sunday I was up and moving around. There was still some very sore spots, but the swelling had gone down and the ice was no longer needed. I returned to work on Monday morning, but ended up taking Tuesday off after I had pushed it a little too hard too soon. I think the thing that caught me off guard the most was the after-effects which weren't discussed by the doctor and I had no idea what the hell was going on. Namely, I couldn't tell when I had to piss. You know that feeling you get when your bladder is telling you it needs some pressure relief? Well, I couldn't get that feeling at all. I wasn't incontinent or anything, but I would have to just guess if I might have to piss every so often. It was a weird experience. After asking some other guys who have gotten the Big V, the consensus was that it has to do with the local anesthetic you get down in the scrotum just before the cut is made. Tasty. Anyway, that was fairly annoying for about a week.
Full recovery was marked about 2 full weeks after the surgery. Bladder fill sensors were functioning, I didn't have to walk around like a cowboy any more, and things were generally happy down below once again.
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